


to be who we are

by allthefadinglights



Category: Formula 1 RPF, Formula 2 RPF, Motorsport RPF
Genre: Callum annoys him until he talks to him, Communication, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Marcus gets in a weird mood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-13 18:53:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29406516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allthefadinglights/pseuds/allthefadinglights
Summary: Marcus has really been in a mood lately, Callum can tell. Where he’s usually up for anything and hardly ever gets mad, he’s irritable and impatient these days.
Relationships: Marcus Armstrong/Callum Ilott
Comments: 6
Kudos: 86





	to be who we are

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I think I'm gonna take a bit of a break from writing, for a week or so. I like my fics best when they just flow and I don't have to struggle writing it - and that's exactly what I've been doing on the last few. Hope some time off will help me get that flow back. 
> 
> In the meantime, feel free to come drop me some prompts over on [my Tumblr](http://allthefadinglights.tumblr.com/) if you have anything you'd like written but don't wanna write yourself. I can't promise I'll write everything, but I will definitely use them for inspiration!

Marcus has really been in a mood lately, Callum can tell. Where he’s usually up for anything and hardly ever gets mad, he’s irritable and impatient these days. It makes Callum feel like he’s walking on egg shells around the house, like anything can set Marcus off, and he doesn’t want to see Marcus angry. He’s just not sure what to do or how he can help. And Marcus refuses to talk to him. Oh, he’ll talk about unimportant things, like the weather, or how his sim session went, or what’s for dinner, but as soon as Callum asks him about how he’s feeling or what’s on his mind, he shuts down - says it’s none of Callum’s business or snaps at him to leave him alone. 

It wasn’t always like this - Marcus usually does talk to Callum when something’s up. Callum just doesn’t know why things have changed. He’s determined to get it out of him one way or another, however, because it’s both affecting his comfort in his own home and his friendship with Marcus. And something is very clearly wrong. Callum really hopes he hasn’t done anything stupid, like offend or hurt Marcus in any way, but usually Marcus just comes out and tells him he’s an asshole. 

“Tonight is movie night,” Callum declares as Marcus enters the kitchen. “I do not take no for an answer but you can choose the movie if you want to.”

“What if I don’t want to watch a movie?” Marcus is frowning at him as he makes himself a bowl of cereal. “I’m not really in the mood to pretend everything’s all fine and dandy.”

“Too bad, you don’t get a choice today. I’ve been watching you sulk around the house for nearly a week now and you refuse to talk to me, so we’re gonna watch a movie tonight and you’ll just have to accept it.” Callum holds his breath when he’s done talking, knows he may have crossed a line here. Marcus doesn’t like being told what to do so he might be in for a massive argument. They’ve only had one of those before, though he can’t even remember what it was about, just Marcus shouting at him. It haunted him for weeks after, even when Marcus had already apologised a thousand times. 

Much to Callum’s surprise, Marcus admits defeat. “Fine. But we’re watching something I like.” 

“Sure,” Callum says, relieved and delighted that Marcus didn’t fight him on this. “I’ll get some popcorn as well, we can make it a cheat day.” Okay, he might be pushing his luck here, but Marcus seems to be in a more agreeable mood today as opposed to his previous instant anger. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Marcus mumbles, taking his cereal with him back to his room. Obviously, it’s not the enthusiasm Callum was hoping for, but this is probably as good as it’s going to get what with Marcus like this. He _will_ get it out of Marcus tonight, even if he has to hold him down until he talks. It’s gone on long enough. 

He tries to get Marcus to join him outside for lunch, but gives up when a heavy object hits the door on the inside - probably a shoe. Marcus only appears for dinner, which Callum cooked - again -, taking his plate with him back to his room. Usually Marcus just goes stir crazy if he spends the entire day in his room but not today, apparently. After dinner, Callum does the dishes and sets up popcorn and drinks by the tv. He’s curious if Marcus will actually show up for the movie or if he’s going to have to risk a shoe to the head when he drags Marcus along. But Marcus surprises him once again, showing up in the living room dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants. Callum recognises the hoodie - it’s one of his - and it looks a little oversized on him. But he’s here, he came voluntarily and that lifts Callum’s spirits. 

Marcus picks a random movie on Netflix, taking a bowl of popcorn for himself and sinking down on the sofa next to Callum. The sofa is barely big enough for two people on it, though neither of them take up that much space, so Marcus’ leg is pressed against Callum’s. He hasn’t said a word yet and he looks exhausted. Callum wants nothing more than to pull him close and just hold him until he starts talking, because whatever’s going on has to be serious if it has this big an effect on Marcus. But that’d definitely cross a line and he might end up ruining their entire friendship. They watch the movie in silence, Callum glancing to his left from time to time, sees Marcus is dozing off more and more, slowly leaning into Callum. Callum turns off the movie when Marcus is leaning his full weight against his side, definitely asleep now. Callum carefully readjusts Marcus so he’s lying down on his side with his head in Callum’s lap, softly running his fingers through Marcus’ hair. 

Marcus wakes up about an hour later, blinking before he realises the position he’s in. He turns over on his back, looking up at Callum. “Hi,” Callum says quietly. “You fell asleep.”

“I’m pretty sure I didn’t fall asleep like this,” Marcus yawns, gesturing between them. He doesn’t seem inclined to move, though. 

If there ever was a time to try and get Marcus to talk, this would be it. “Marcus,” Callum starts, noticing Marcus’ questioning eyes on him. “Will you please just tell me what’s going on? And don’t tell me it’s nothing, I just want to help.”

“You can’t help,” Marcus says instantly. “There’s just-“ He lets out a wry laugh, sitting up and moving away from Callum. He misses Marcus’ body heat immediately. “Nothing you can do to help me.”

“I can try,” Callum says. He sounds a little desperate, but he just doesn’t understand what Marcus would keep secret from him. 

“Okay, you wanna know? I’m probably not gonna get a seat in F1, ever, I’m scared my season will go to shit again, I’m in love with you, I miss my family and I’m trying to accept the fact that I won’t see my siblings grow up because I’m never there. Is that enough or do I need to go on?” Marcus has thrown his hands up, crawling into the furthest corner of the sofa looking like he wishes it would swallow him whole.

Callum blinks, and blinks again. One of those things was not like the others. “You’re in love with me?”

“Of course that’s the only thing you heard,” Marcus mumbles. “Yeah, I am, alright? I’ll pack my shit tomorrow and I’ll get Ferrari to find me another apartment.”

“Wow, hang on a second,” Callum protests. “Are you not even gonna give me a second to process this?”

“What’s there to process? How disgusted you are? Do you really need a minute to process your hatred of me?”

“Marcus, shut the fuck up,” Callum says loudly, disrupting Marcus’ monologue. Marcus closes his mouth and just looks at him from his corner. The look on his face tells Callum all he needs to know - he’s not kidding, and he’s terrified. “I don’t hate you. Quite the opposite. Do you think I would’ve pestered you all week to tell me what was wrong if I did?” Marcus is still regarding him with a high level of suspicion. “Oh for the love of god, just- Come here, would you?” Callum opens his arms, hoping Marcus takes the invitation - and he does, hiding his face in Callum’s neck. 

“I didn’t expect you to take it this well, to be honest,” Marcus mumbles, still clinging to him and letting Callum hold him closely. 

Callum huffs out a laugh. “I didn’t expect me to take that this well either, but now that I’ve had a second to process, I’ve come to the realisation that, yeah, being in love with you does explain some of the feelings I’ve been having lately. So that’s one problem solved, what’s the next one we’re tackling?” 

“We?”

“You didn’t actually think I was gonna let you deal with all that on your own, did you? Especially not now we know that this-“ Callum pulls back to look at him, “is a thing. So, what was that about your season going to shit? You’re the championship leader.”

“I’ll do you one better,” Marcus mumbles, lifting his head to meet Callum’s gaze. He raises an eyebrow at that, but he doesn’t have to question what Marcus means by that when he leans in. Callum closes the distance, kissing him softly but keeping it light and sweet. Marcus tries to deepen the kiss but Callum doesn’t let him. Marcus is finally talking, he’s not going to let that slide just to kiss him some more. 

“You’re not getting out of this conversation that easily,” Callum breathes against his lips when he pulls back. “There’ll be plenty of time for this later. Usually I prefer at least one date before kissing but I’ll make an exception for you.” 

“There’s time for talking later as well,” Marcus tries but Callum shakes his head resolutely. 

“We’re doing this together now, so tell me what’s the issue with your season.”

“Together huh?” Marcus smiles. “I can get used to that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are always much appreciated <3 See y'all next week!


End file.
